WHEN A WOMAN has a bad day, it's often about her hair. We agonize. We face hair desperation alone, in the bathroom in front of a mirror. With brushes, gel, heating irons, scissors, chocolate. If things don't get better fast, we often call for an emergency appointment with our stylist (isn't that what we're supposed to call them now?), hoping for an opening in ten minutes.
But men's bad days, let's face it, are never about hair--- theirs, ours, or any body else's.
Safe to say, 99.99999% of the time, men's bad days usually have to do with engines and motorized vehicles: V-6s, V-8s, V-whatevers. Trucks, cars, motorcycles, planes, motorboats, jet skis etc. Basically anything that moves from Point A to B fast---on land, in water, through air by means of horsepower.
When bad truck/ motor days happen to them, men deal very differently than alone in powder rooms in front of a mirrors.
They love these kind of days (it hurts so good!) cause it gives them a chance to bond while they go about fixing something loud and mechanical, yet practical. We women struggle alone in secret, but the guys struggle, groan and moan out-in-the-open--together!
No man who sees another guy suffering with a bad engine or broke truck is going to let him suffer alone. There's no such a reality.
Here's my a universal law: The worse the problem seems, the more guys will appear to fix it. They often magically materialize from nowhere, as if out-of-the woodwork.
So it was Saturday as David Perry rowed us to the takeout ramp (engine-less, but not without strong arms, long oars and good current) at Betty's Island on the Caney Fork river, I had the opportunity to see my theory proved in practice. See for yourself below:
Man with pick-up, towing boat trailer backs down boat ramp to pick up motorboat and mis-estimates stopping distance. Either he decides to roll on down just a little further or his emergency brake doesn't work. At the same time, the river starts to rise due to commencement of power generation ( really big turbine engines upstream) at Center Hill Dam. Instantly men begin to materialize from all directions as they see potential engine/truck problems, not to mention possible boat and water problems.
Truck-boat-water problems are the most fun of all for men to solve most of the time. Splashing around in cold water on a hot summer day adds to the importance.
More men gravitate towards the boat, being drug off its trailer far from its truck.....
After 25 minutes of a heavy-lifting, hernia producing male bonding, the truck is successfully dragged/wenched out of the rising water. The trailer first detached is re-attached. The motorboat however remains in the river instead of on the trailer behind the truck. The men decide to let the river rise more before re-uniting boat with trailer and truck. They continue working, bonding as we leave the boat ramp. No one doubts men's final victory over truck, boat, trailer and potential engine failure and rising water....
Mission almost, but not completely, accomplished.....male bonding/problem solving continue....A good time is had by all on a bad truck day......
Meanwhile, river guide version of the Maytag repair man--- today--- soldiers on alone at the takeout with no truck problems, no engine problems, no boat problems and, best of all, no fishing problems. A good day for a guy. Somebody has to have it.